Robert Lee Camp
This was indeed a different kind of presidential race. It was the most polarizing one I have ever witnessed. For those who don’t really know what polarizing means, it means it caused most people to take opposite sides in a more dramatic way. I give Donald Trump the most credit for this. He was blatantly outspoken in a most outrageous way. It’s true the most elections involve mudslinging in both directions, but this one was the most that any of us had ever seen. And I want to say up front that I know even writing about this causes me to take recourse.
If I say something that even appears to benefit either side, I will be shunned. So, let me get this out of the way right up front. I never liked Hillary Clinton. I did predict that she had a better chance of winning, just because I knew she and Bill had prepared for this for a long time. But I was wrong.
In hindsight I think it is because Donald’s 3 ♦ is Saturn to Hillary’s K ♣. It does make sense, especially considering that the main thrust of his campaign was the ‘Crooked Hillary’ routine. It certainly would make it easier for him to do, being one of her Saturn cards. Obama is Hillary’s direct Saturn card in her Life Spread. I knew she would never win against him.
And at one point, I saw how this polarization thing was hurting everyone. I saw how a large percentage of our country were going to be very disappointed after the election results. Someone was going to be the winner and someone the loser. And no matter who won, a large number of people are going to be very sad, hurt, and disappointed. Suffering is a guaranteed result of such polarization. That made me feel sad for those who would be losers.
Lena and I have been watching a lot of college and pro football lately. And when one team really loses bad, the losing team’s fans just sit there, with their hands on their head, in disbelief. It is a very sad picture, to say the least. This hands over the head pose must be some universal thing we do when we are very disappointed. I thought of so many people feeling this way after the election.
But the night of the actual election, I chose to not watch TV and just wait until the morning to find out what happened. The next morning I woke up and really asked myself how I felt. I did not yet know who won. I saw that I had adopted a point of view about the election. I had a story to tell about Hillary and Bill. And, this is the most important part,
I realized that I had become identified with being someone who takes the time to really investigate things and find the apparent ‘truth’ in it. I saw how this identification sort of boxed me into taking a side in the election, or any election. But it went much deeper than that. Why, I asked myself, do I need to be a guy to has to investigate and come up with the more truthful truth about any situation I encounter? I saw that my life has been based largely upon being right about certain things. And this being right has spilled over into most every area of my life.
I have not voted for anything for at least 40 years. In truth I don’t really care who gets elected. But this identification with being the ‘knowing guy’ is what got me into it. And prior to this realization I had done my homework. I read all the Wikileaks posts and was convinced of a lot of things about the Clintons, all of them negative of course. Some part of me knew this was not the real truth, but my J ♣ mind just held on to these ideas. I had proof, dammit! But I knew this was not the real thing. It didn’t even feel right.
So, I lay there in my bed the morning after the election and just felt into that need to be right. I think I lay there for about 30 minutes, till I got to this place where I thought, ‘I will be fine regardless of who wins this election.’ And it wasn’t just a thought, it was what was true for me. I really let go of my need to be right and was ready, and excited, to see what the universe had in store for me. So, I got up and went to my office and found out that Trump won. I have to admit that I did feel a nice feeling upon realizing that. I felt the same way when Obama won. It brought up good feelings, who knows why? But I also felt compassion for the Clinton supporters who I knew must be suffering.
I have learned from listening to Eckhart Tolle, and by my own experience that the ego thrives on having enemies. It loves to take sides so that it can have someone to fight against. By fighting with others, it strengthens its sense of uniqueness and separateness from others. The ego never seeks to be in union with others. It needs enemies to survive, no matter how sweet-sounding its beliefs are.
Even the most self-proclaiming spiritual people have huge egos that are in operation on a more or less constant basis. Every time I look at the things that are happening in the world now and things that have been happening for thousands of years, I see this is the underlying dynamic. People find something to believe in and then fight against the enemies of that belief, all the while feeling superior to others in the process.
But I never saw it so personally as during this election. And I decided that for me, I don’t need that. I don’t need to make anyone wrong, or to be right, or to fight someone about anything. Even my work with the cards has been somewhat of a fight. I have these ways of using the cards that I feel so certain about and I fight against those who do the cards differently, or who don’t meet up with my spiritually based moral standards. All of this is really unnecessary for me now. I still catch myself doing it but I seem to catch myself sooner.
It is my crazy, J ♣ mind, who for most of my life has protected me by figuring out what is true and real and committing to that like my life depended on it. Our egos’ lives do depend on our being right, at least they think they do. And they cause us to act out of that defensive mechanism and do the most horrific things to others who threaten our beliefs and ideas.
Personally I am grateful for this election because it showed me so much of myself and the pattern I have been living under for so long. And my only desire now is to rid myself of those separation behaviors that have me take sides. It just isn’t as fun as just being peaceful. It’s a heavy burden to carry around all these beliefs that must be defended against. I don’t really desire that any more. As I mentioned before, I still get caught up sometimes. But there is an awareness there that I am grateful for, one that has me catch myself much sooner.